INSIPID TALK/ਫਿਕਾ ਬੋਲਿ

ABSTRACT

Harsh words/talk is considered ill-mannered or discourteous or a rude behavior. A person can be evaluated the way he/she talks or communicates verbally or otherwise. Insipid (ਫਿਕਾ) talk causes only grief and a humble talk brings respect says Guru Nanak in Sri Raag:

ਜਿਤੁ ਬੋਲਿਐ ਪਤਿ ਪਾਈਐ ਸੋ ਬੋਲਿਆ ਪਰਵਾਣੁ ॥

ਫਿਕਾ ਬੋਲਿ ਵਿਗੁਚਣਾ ਸੁਣਿ ਮੂਰਖ ਮਨ ਅਜਾਣ ॥
Jiṯ boli­ai paṯ pā­ī­ai so boli­ā parvāṇ. Fikā bol vigucẖṇā suṇ mūrakẖ man ajāṇ.

Those words are acceptable, which, when spoken, bring honor. Harsh words bring only grief. Listen, O foolish and ignorant mind!-----Guru Nanak, Sri Raag, AGGS, Page, 15-14

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Harshness (ਫਿਕਾ) is defined as:

1. Relatively undeveloped; primitive: a rude behavior.
2.  
1. Being crude and rough.
2. Exhibiting a marked lack of skill or precision in work.
3.  
1. Lacking the graces and refinement of civilized life; uncouth.
2. Lacking education or knowledge; unlearned.
3. Ill-mannered; discourteous: rude behavior.
4. Vigorous, robust, and sturdy.
5. Abruptly and unpleasantly forceful: received a rude shock.----Web Definition.

Truth is a comprehensive term that in all of its nuances implies accuracy and honesty, but now days if told it could be taken as harsh (ਫਿਕਾ), as the proverb; “Truth is bitter.” Truthful talk leads to spiritual growth while insipid talk leads to unpleasantness, anxiety, resentment and anger aggravating the lower instincts.

The danger to the Sikh faith comes from degeneration of morals, from beclouding one's mental horizon and from the atrophy of moral and spiritual nature. Individuals put their vested interest first, and truths and ideals go begging. Moral life cannot be lived in aloof. Morality is the nurse of Truth and spirituality.

There are plenty more Character defects than insipid talk leading one away from spirituality;

Character defects:

1. Harshness, Resentment, Anger.
2. Fear, Cowardice.
3. Self pity.
4. Self justification.
5. Self importance, Egotism.
6. Self condemnation, Guilt.
7. Lying, Evasiveness, Dishonesty.
8. Impatience.
9. Hate.
10. False pride, Phoniness, Denial.
11. Jealousy.
12. Envy.
13. Laziness.
14. Procrastination.
15. Insincerity.
16. Negative Thinking.
17. Immoral thinking.
18. Perfectionism, Intolerance.
19. Criticizing, Loose Talk, Gossip.
20. Greed.

Following hymns from Sabd Guru says much more about harsh words:

ਨਾਨਕ ਫਿਕੈ ਬੋਲਿਐ ਤਨੁ ਮਨੁ ਫਿਕਾ ਹੋਇ ॥

ਫਿਕੋ ਫਿਕਾ ਸਦੀਐ ਫਿਕੇ ਫਿਕੀ ਸੋਇ ॥

ਫਿਕਾ ਦਰਗਹ ਸਟੀਐ ਮੁਹਿ ਥੁਕਾ ਫਿਕੇ ਪਾਇ ॥

ਫਿਕਾ ਮੂਰਖੁ ਆਖੀਐ ਪਾਣਾ ਲਹੈ ਸਜਾਇ ॥
Nanak fikai boli-ai tan man fikaa ho-ay, fiko fikaa sadee-ai fikay fikee so-ay. fikaa dargeh satee-ai muhi thukaa fikay paa-ay. fikaa moorakh aakhee-ai paanaa lahai sajaa-ay.

O Nanak, speaking insipid words, the body and mind become insipid. Such person is called the most insipid of the insipid; and insipid is his reputation. The insipid person is discarded in the Court of the God, and the insipid one's face is spat upon. The insipid one is called a fool; he is beaten with shoes in punishment.-----Guru Nanak, Raag Asa, AGGS, Page, 473-14,15

ਸਬਦੈ ਸਾਦੁ ਨ ਆਇਓ ਨਾਮਿ ਨ ਲਗੋ ਪਿਆਰੁ ॥

ਰਸਨਾ ਫਿਕਾ ਬੋਲਣਾ ਨਿਤ ਨਿਤ ਹੋਇ ਖੁਆਰੁ ॥

ਨਾਨਕ ਪਇਐ ਕਿਰਤਿ ਕਮਾਵਣਾ ਕੋਇ ਨ ਮੇਟਣਹਾਰੁ ॥੨॥
sabdai saad na aa-i-o naam na lago pi-aar, rasnaa fikaa bolnaa nit nit ho-ay khu-aar.

One who does not savor the taste of the Sabd, who does not love the Name of God, and who speaks insipid words with his tongue, is ruined, again and again.-----Guru Nanak, Raag Suhi, AGGS, Page, 791-5 and Guru Amar Das, Raag Vadhans, AGGS, Page, 594-1

ਦੁਰਮਤਿ ਝੂਠੀ ਬੁਰੀ ਬੁਰਿਆਰਿ ॥
ਅਉਗਣਿਆਰੀ ਅਉਗਣਿਆਰਿ ॥
ਕਚੀ ਮਤਿ ਫੀਕਾ ਮੁਖਿ ਬੋਲੈ ਦੁਰਮਤਿ ਨਾਮੁ ਨ ਪਾਈ ਹੇ ॥
Ḏurmaṯ jẖūṯẖī burī buri▫ār.A▫ugaṇi▫ārī a▫ugaṇi▫ār. Kacẖī maṯ fīkā mukẖ bolai ḏurmaṯ nām na pā­ī hė.

The false and evil-minded are the most wicked of the wicked. They are the most unworthy of the unworthy. With false intellect, and insipid words of mouth, evil-minded, they do not obtain the Naam.-----Guru Amar Das, Raag Maru, AGGS, Page, 1047-8

ਹਉਮੈ ਫਿਕਾ ਬੋਲਣਾ ਬੁਝਿ ਨ ਸਕਾ ਕਾਰ ॥

ਵਣੁ ਤ੍ਰਿਣੁ ਤ੍ਰਿਭਵਣੁ ਤੁਝੈ ਧਿਆਇਦਾ ਅਨਦਿਨੁ ਸਦਾ ਵਿਹਾਣ ॥

ਬਿਨੁ ਸਤਿਗੁਰ ਕਿਨੈ ਨ ਪਾਇਆ ਕਰਿ ਕਰਿ ਥਕੇ ਵੀਚਾਰ ॥
ha-umai fikaa bolnaa bujh na sakaa kaar vaṇ ṯariṇ ṯaribẖavaṇ ṯujẖai ḏẖi▫ā▫iḏā an▫ḏin saḏā vihāṇ bin satgur kinai na paa-i-aa kar kar thakay veechaar.

With harsh words & egotism at heart no one can worship God. The forests and fields, and all the three worlds meditate on You, O God; this is the way they pass their days and nights forever. Without the True Guru, no one finds the God, as people have grown weary by worshiping God in their own way.-----Guru Amar Das, Sloke Vaaran To Vadheek, AGGS, Page, 1420-18

ਇਕੁ ਫਿਕਾ ਨ ਗਾਲਾਇ ਸਭਨਾ ਮੈ ਸਚਾ ਧਣੀ ॥

ਹਿਆਉ ਨ ਕੈਹੀ ਠਾਹਿ ਮਾਣਕ ਸਭ ਅਮੋਲਵੇ ॥
Ik Fikaa Na Gaalaa-ay Sabhnaa Mai Sachaa Dhanee, Hi-aa-o Na Kaihee Thaahi Maanak Sabh Amolvay.

Do not utter even a single harsh word to any one since Immortal God and Master abides in all. Do not break anyone's heart; these are all priceless jewels.-----Sheikh Farid Sloke #129, AGGS, Page, 1384-17

Tongue is the worst weapon, wound caused by it may never heal or take long time to heal as it can break some one’s heart and Sheikh Farid ponders about it in his Slokes:

ਫਰੀਦਾ ਜੇ ਤੂ ਅਕਲਿ ਲਤੀਫੁ ਕਾਲੇ ਲਿਖੁ ਨ ਲੇਖ ॥

ਆਪਨੜੇ ਗਿਰੀਵਾਨ ਮਹਿ ਸਿਰੁ ਨਂ​‍ੀਵਾਂ ਕਰਿ ਦੇਖੁ ॥

Farīḏā jė ṯū akal laṯīf kālė likẖ na lėkẖ, Āpnaṛė girīvān meh sir nīʼnvāʼn kar ḏėkẖ.

Farid, if you have a keen understanding, then do not write black marks against anyone else. Look underneath your own collar instead.-----Farid Sloke # 6, AGGS, Page, 1378

ਸਭਨਾ ਮਨ ਮਾਣਿਕ ਠਾਹਣੁ ਮੂਲਿ ਮਚਾਂਗਵਾ ॥

ਜੇ ਤਉ ਪਿਰੀਆ ਦੀ ਸਿਕ ਹਿਆਉ ਨ ਠਾਹੇ ਕਹੀ ਦਾ ॥

Sabẖnā man māṇik ṯẖāhaṇ mūl macẖāʼngvā, Jė ṯa­o pirī­ā ḏī sik hi­ā­o na ṯẖāhė kahī ḏā.

It is not good and advisable to injure the feelings of others, as their mind is as precious as emeralds and rubies. More over if you desire the Beloved God, distress no one’s heart.-----Farid Sloke # 130, AGGS, Page, 1384

There is a Persian expression attributed to God by Muslims:

I can allow you to destroy a temple or a mosque, but to break another’s heart is an act that cannot be sanctioned. The temple and the mosque may be repaired or renewed, but not the broken heart.

Conclusion:

Conviction without experience makes for harshness. A little learning is a dangerous thing. Of all the causes in erring judgment, and misguide the mind; is pride, the never-failing vice of self-willed. All partial evil, universal good; and spite of pride, in erring reason’s spite, One Truth is clear, whatever is, is right. A pleasant illusion is better than a harsh reality. Truth is harsh but uncompromising as justice. It is not good to hurt other's sentiments. No body likes a person who speaks harsh words.

Physical injury heals but insults caused by harsh words keep haunting a person for a long time to come, i.e. why tongue is called the worst weapon. A man of sweet speech and manners is loved by one and all. Such a man never lacks co-operation and help as everybody is willing to lend him a helping hand at the time of his need.